Alt. Use

sink2

I got so distracted by the “Best of Craig’s List” that I almost forgot to post something tonight. However, I found this “alternative” use for a sink (which I have heard spoken of in the past, but never in this detail), which I thought I’d share.

I can think of violently few disadvantages to peeing in a sink. Off the top of my head:
– peeing into a sink after eating asparagus is very unpleasant;
– fishing a contact lens out of the sink while ‘multitasking’ is disturbing; and,
– reflexive tumescence may result from the splash of overly cold or hot water, which can have messy consequences.

I am aware that this technique d’avant garde might offend the eyeballs of an accidental witness, so I always exercise discretion when I pee in the sink. That said, peeing in the sink is so routine for me that I am complacent, and I never thought up a contingency plan should someone walk in on me.

Just this morning my girlie busted me peeing in the sink, rather (as I now understand), ‘her’ sink. She f***ing had a cow and slapped my d***…hard …like it was a big hairy f***ing spider on the countertop.

Thus I know from experience that getting caught peeing in the sink does not garner even the tiniest, wee little bit of appreciation of or for any of those benefits I mentioned above. Therefore, heed this exhortation: make damn site sure no one will walk in as you pee in the sink.

The story continues, with an even funnier conclusion, here (though without the editing, it’s a bit NSFW).

I read a passage in Don DeLillo’s White Noise where some men were comparing the coldest place they ever peed in a sink. I suppose that suggests it’s more commonplace than just “have you ever” peed in a sink. I’m not sure– I prefer the woods to any place else.

Speaking of “multitasking,” this first track has an absolutely incredible number of tracks running simultaneously. Plz to listen.

I can’t tell how many different songs are mixed into this second track, but it sounds fantastic.

They really play some games with the frequency range of this final track, so make sure to listen to it with good headphones. Half the fun will be gone if you just use laptop speakers.

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